I can see clearly now
As promised, here are my then-and-now photos. The photo on the left was taken in February 2008, the one on the right just today. And YES, I can finally see the difference! Obviously, I still have a long way to go, but it’s great to feel so much healthier and happier already. I climbed all the stairs by the Oceanside Pier today without even getting short of breath — while having a conversation! Click on the photo to see it larger on Flickr, along with a few of my favorites from today.
When I first downloaded the photos from the Nikon, I started crying. I honestly could not see any difference in myself at all. It took an hour of looking at photo after photo with Bret pointing out the differences before my mind began to accept it. When it began to sink in, I was shocked. I don’t look repulsive! I’m not even embarrassed to show people these photos! Usually I’d rather get a root canal than share pictures of myself. Because, you know, people don’t look at me when they’re standing right in front of me or anything. Ahem.
Bret tends to go a bit apeshit with the shutter release when he’s got the Nikon, and he actually took 375 pictures during our two hours at the beach today (seriously), but only about 100 of them are of me. Still, that’s a lot of images to sort through, even considering the many, many near-duplicates taken milliseconds apart. I’m not happy with the technical quality of today’s pics — most of them are hazy and my face is too shadowed. I did some adjusting, but couldn’t get much improvement. But they served their purpose, and that’s what counts.
Incidentally, these photos today and the few I uploaded a week ago are the first ones I’ve put on Flickr without digitally “touching myself up.” They are the true, unedited me, and that alone is a huge, huge step in my journey toward self-acceptance. I am proud of myself for taking it.
November 16th, 2008 at 11:01 pm
WOW!!!!
Catherine´s last blog post: Sunrise
November 17th, 2008 at 4:39 am
Holy missing poundage, Batman!
Lookin’ good!
kapgar´s last blog post: My baby takes the mornin’ train…
November 17th, 2008 at 8:44 am
You’re looking great. I am so proud of you. I hope this helps… helps with how you were feeling. This should keep you going! :)
kilax´s last blog post: Mental Preparation
November 17th, 2008 at 9:37 am
I’m so glad Bret sat with you and helped you see the physical changes, because I know how hard it is to see a difference in your own head, and how important it is to you to have the motivation that comes from seeing you change. I’m so very happy for you SJ, that you’re feeling better, both inside and out. Great big hugs!!
November 17th, 2008 at 10:39 am
That’s so awesome! Big, big hugs!
November 17th, 2008 at 11:14 am
Look at that!
I find that with weight loss, excercise. I’ve had to focus on the non visual things. Like walking up the stairs without getting out breath. From a purely quality of life issue, that’s huge.
Congrats!
Nat´s last blog post: Lip service
November 17th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
You look amazing! Glad you are starting to see the changes.
Foo´s last blog post: gimme some sugah…
November 17th, 2008 at 9:20 pm
i am so proud of you! you look amazing. so inspiring.
November 18th, 2008 at 3:52 pm
Wow. Major congrats. Very cool.
martymankins´s last blog post: Snowy Sunday #01
November 18th, 2008 at 9:01 pm
It’s so great to see you feeling good about yourself!
sizzle´s last blog post: I Saw You
November 18th, 2008 at 9:30 pm
I want to thank all of you for your wonderful comments! Knowing that my friends are cheering me on really helps during the rough patches. I
every one of you! 
November 22nd, 2008 at 11:13 pm
What a great picture! You look so much happier in the second picture. It’s so nice when you can notice the difference, both in how you look and in how you feel. You’ve worked really hard and it’s great that you are feeling the benefits!
floating princess´s last blog post: Girl-cation
November 23rd, 2008 at 9:06 pm
As one who has struggled with her weight her entire life, let me say CONGRATULATIONS and YOU GO, GIRL!!!
Ginger´s last blog post: GingerSnaps’ Fireside Chat-Vol. 1
November 25th, 2008 at 12:45 pm
You look wonderful! Keep going - you’re over the hard part now… it gets easier.
khadijateri´s last blog post: Photo journalism - Libya in Life
November 28th, 2008 at 4:09 pm
Hi there,
I just wanted to say that you look amazing!!!!
I’m starting a new diet again real soon, so I always like to see people who have made a change!
Big kiss,
Krijn
K-Online´s last blog post: Vertrouwelijk