Tagectomy
Sometimes I do such stupid things I seriously think they need to make room for me in the hammer bag.
Yesterday, I snipped off a skin tag with nail clippers. You know what skin tags are, right? Creepy little pieces of skin that just suddenly appear on your body. If you don’t get them, consider yourself lucky. Although ugly, they’re usually harmless, but this particular one happened to form right where my bra band sits. It was constantly getting irritated and sore, and I was fed up with it. I’d been twisting it and picking at it for days, trying to make it shrivel and fall off. No luck, so I decided to take more drastic measures.
Of course I sterilized the clippers AND the site; do you think I’m stupid? Don’t answer that. And I was careful to position the clippers right up against my skin at the base of the tag. And then I snipped.
OH MY GOD it hurt. BUT … it did not come completely off. Apparently the clippers weren’t sharp enough. I was cut, bleeding, but the skin tag was still hanging on. I had to clip it again, and then yank to pull it off. It tore off more skin than I’d intended. And then the blood GUSHED. Holy fucking shit, did it bleed. I was trying to swab it with peroxide, but the blood was soaking the cotton pads as fast as I could apply them. I started grabbing washcloths out of the cabinet to staunch the flow. It just wouldn’t stop. Panicking, I yelled for Bret. He ran in, stopping dead at the sight of me pressing blood-soaked washcloths against my side, red drops and dribbles all over the cabinet and floor.
I like to think he yelled that loud because he was momentarily frightened. I don’t believe he really thinks I’m a stupendously fucktarded dickwit. He was just taken aback, don’t you think? At any rate, he performed some spectacular first aid, slandering my intelligence all the while. Alcohol was applied profusely, followed by an ice pack wrapped in dry cloths, and pressure while I rested on the bed. After about 30 minutes, the bleeding finally stopped. We didn’t have any bandaging supplies, so Bret used scotch tape to hold a panty shield over the wound. [Note: Do not EVER do this.]
I’m sore today, but other than the rash caused by the scotch tape, everything seems to be healing nicely. The excision site looks rather like an oversized cigarette burn. I’m applying Neosporin regularly to prevent infection. And yes, I definitely learned my lesson.
But! The icky skin tag is GONE.
June 16th, 2008 at 8:51 pm
My mom gets those. I don’t know if she removes them though. That sounds awful! That was the skin tag from hell, I guess!
kilax’s last blog post: Friday Question #29
June 16th, 2008 at 8:58 pm
I have had those and the Fella has them too. I am pretty sure I did what you did once but I ICED it before I snipped it. USE ICE or better yet, go to a dermatologist. :O
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June 16th, 2008 at 10:15 pm
Oh my my…for future reference, get some fishing wire. Tie the fishing wire very tightly around the base of the skin tag. After about a week, the blood flow will be lost and the damned thing will just fall right off. Yanno, without blood and maxi pads and such.
Hope you heal soon!!! :pph:
June 16th, 2008 at 10:16 pm
Hrm, what happened to the heart tag and my CommentLuv? Sigh, your site hates me ;) .
Hilly’s last blog post: I?m So Yours For The Taking?.
June 17th, 2008 at 6:36 am
Kim: It was definitely the tagectomy from hell, for sure!
Sizzle: ICE! I wish I’d thought to do that. Thanks for the advice.
Hilly: My site does NOT hate you! CommentLuv just does that sometimes. I’ve had it happen to me over at Bec’s and at Karl’s. I will DEFINTELY try the fishing wire thing!
June 17th, 2008 at 8:14 am
EEEP! I hope you heal quickly. And I will keep Hilly’s advice in mind if ever I decide to excise a skin tag of mine…
suze’s last blog post: reason mike rocks: number 537
June 17th, 2008 at 8:16 am
(although, technically, I guess that would be ligation… so if I ever decide to ligate one would be more correct ;) )
suze’s last blog post: reason mike rocks: number 537
June 17th, 2008 at 9:15 am
Owchhhhh! I haven’t had one of these but I have heard similar horror stories about home surgery! Hope you’re healing well and please don’t attempt to slaughter yourself again! ;)
Penelope’s last blog post: You’ve lost that lovin’ feeling.
June 17th, 2008 at 2:56 pm
Believe it or not, I had a similar but not so dramatic issue with a skin thingy on my toe. Henceforth, I will consult Hilly prior to undertaking any procedures.
Ick. But glad you’re ok.
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June 17th, 2008 at 4:30 pm
Um, EWWWW!
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June 17th, 2008 at 6:11 pm
Okay, no longer hungry for dinner.
Glad you’re okay as well.
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June 17th, 2008 at 7:09 pm
Suze: LIGATION! I knew excision was wrong, but couldn’t come up with the right one. Thanks, Suze.
Penelope: I’ll definitely be more careful from now on.
Nat: Calling Dr. Hilly!
Karl: Seriously? This bothered you? I didn’t think it was THAT graphic.
Kevin: Thanks!
June 17th, 2008 at 9:28 pm
Am I the only one who’s thinking, “BWA-HAHAHAHAHAHA!” … okay, it’s just me. But this sounds EXACTLY like the kind of DIY thing I would try. And in fact, I’ve got some skin tags on my neck that are driving me nuts and I’ve been thinking about grabbing my clippers too. But now? Think I’ll dial the dermatologist instead.
My mom used to get fat round skin tags on her neck; she’d wrap sewing thread around them like Hilly described using the fishing line. So she’s right — it does work if you have the patience for it.
This was a great post — you successfully combined a cautionary tale with a funny re-telling. :)
June 17th, 2008 at 9:38 pm
P.S. I wonder if those over-the-counter remedies for wart removal (Freeze Off, or Freeze Away) would work on skin tags. Hmm, maybe I will try that; I am really, really tired of doctor’s offices this year.
Ante up: I’ll see you one bloody washrag and raise you one frostbite. :o)
Carolyn Bahm’s last blog post: Today Is a Good Day to Diet
June 18th, 2008 at 12:00 am
i HATE those damn things. but i could never do that. NEVER. i mean, i can take a six-hour tattoo session, piercings in my tongue and my eyebrow - but no. thank. you.
June 18th, 2008 at 8:19 pm
I’m lucky. My husband’s a family practice doc and when I get tags that annoy me, he snips them off for me in the office. He uses a sterilized kit and silver nitrate (to stop bleeding). If you casually mention them to your doctor, s/he’ll most likely offer to take care of them. If your insurance covers them, it’s likely they’ll bill for it. If not or you’re paying out of pocket, most of the doctors I’ve known do them “off the record” for you. Just ask. It’s no big whoop. :)
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June 19th, 2008 at 2:32 pm
I’ve clipped off skin tags like that before. I’ve had fish eat them off in a lake (just as painful as it sounds). Carolyn’s idea about wart remover is the best. You just put it on and cover with a Band-Aid.
It takes a few weeks but it’s a lot less painful.
June 19th, 2008 at 10:49 pm
Carolyn: Thanks for the writing praise - I’m honored! Yeah, I think I’m going to try the freeze-off stuff.
Juli: This from the girl who just got her nipples pierced?!?! Get real! :O
Eden: I’ll try that when I’m there next month.
ajooja: Is that fish thing for real?!?! Why didn’t you just bat them away? I mean, that must’ve taken awhile, right?
June 26th, 2008 at 4:53 pm
Been there, done that but never brave enough to post about it… Why do those things bleed so freaking much?