Today, it’s all about ME
Today is my birthday. My 55th birthday. I am now officially old. A senior citizen. Senior discounts and shit. Well, except for the places that have bumped up the qualifying age to 62, which is almost everyone.
I don’t feel old. I could be kidding myself, but I don’t think I look old, either. Not senior-citizen old, anyway. I don’t have a lot of wrinkles (no fat jokes, please). I still love rock & roll. I still crave sex. I still have all my own teeth, although four of them are in my jewelry box (wisdom teeth). I am not a grandmother, yet. How can I possibly be counted as a senior citizen?
When I was a kid, senior citizens were retired and drove around the country in Winnebagos. The men wore straw Panamas, plaid shorts, and moccasin loafers with black socks. The women had blue hair and wore flowered “house dresses” and Keds with white socks. They wore hearing aids, and took their teeth out at night. And they generally died by the age of 75.
Today’s so-called “seniors”? Yeah, not so much with the elderly stuff. Like Dennis Hopper says, we Boomers are redefining retirement. Or something like that. I think we’re redefining retirement as “non-existent.” We’re all just going to keep working till we drop dead in the express line at Starbucks, cell phones still firmly pressed to our ears. And we’re fighting the withering every step of the way with our collagen injections and our boob lifts and our hair plugs. Well, they are. Some of us prefer fish oil, yoga and green tea.
Okay, so I’m 55. That makes me 16 years younger than Dennis Hopper, 9 years younger than Mick Jagger, 8 years younger than George Lucas, 5 years younger than Hillary Clinton, 3 years younger than Bruce Springsteen and 2 years younger than Steve Wozniak. But hey, if AMC wants to take $2 off my movie ticket for pretending I’m old, I’m in.
And now, just because it’s my birthday, I’ve got a little quiz below the jump, and it’s all about me!
HOW WELL DO YOU KNOW SJ?
Hilly and Kevin did this awhile back, but I’ve been saving it for my birthday. Post your guesses in the comments, and watch for the correct answers!
1. What’s my favorite ethnic cuisine?
a. Greek
b. Mexican
c. Thai
2. Which one of these have I NOT done in public?
a. Swim naked
b. Have sex
c. Wet my pants
3. Where was I born, 55 years ago today?
a. Tripoli, Libya
b. Kennett, Missouri
c. San Bernardino, California
4. What is my favorite color?
a. Purple
b. Turquoise
c. Pink
5. Which James Bond is my favorite?
a. Sean Connery
b. Roger Moore
c. Daniel Craig
6. What is the one major holiday I really, really dislike?
a. Christmas
b. Halloween
c. Easter
7. Which item would be the hardest for me to live without?
a. My camera
b. My computer
c. My television
8. Which appetizer am I least likely to order?
a. Guacamole and chips
b. Fried macaroni & cheese balls
c. Onion rings with wasabi dip
9. Which of these can I NOT do?
a. Roller skate
b. Roll my tongue
c. Drive a stick shift
10. Where is my dream home located?
a. A secluded mountain cabin in Colorado
b. A retro-influenced split-level on the cliffs of Cardiff, CA
c. A modern pueblo in the desert near Tucson, AZ
[tags]Baby boomers, senior citizens, aging[/tags]
December 7th, 2007 at 7:12 am
First, HAPPY BIRTHDAY! You look mahvelous, dahlink!
And here are my wild guesses:
1. c
2. a
3. c
4. a
5. a
6. a
7. a
8. c
9. b
10. b
I’m pretty sure I blew the quiz but it was fun anyhow.
December 7th, 2007 at 8:21 am
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MY SUPER DUPER FRIEND :).
I am going to try to get most of these right, hah. Some of them I just KNOW and others are a guess but I have an excuse that I will milk to death…pain killer hangover. Does that work for you? What? No excuses on YOUR day? Fine then…here goes ;).
1. mexican (b)
2. uh….have sex? (b)
3. Kennet, Missouri (b)
4. pink (c)
5. total guess here…Sean Connery (a)
6. Easter (c)
7. camera (a)
8. GUACAMOLE AND CHIPS! (a)
9. roll your tongue (b)
10. b
December 7th, 2007 at 8:42 am
I can’t even try to guess the answers, so I’m just going to wish you a Happy Birthday!
December 7th, 2007 at 10:09 am
Happy Happy Birthday!
December 7th, 2007 at 10:13 am
First, let me say HAPPY BIRTHDAY my dear friend. I’m right behind you and 55 is gonna be a great year.
Here are my answers:
1. B Mexican (our choice of restaurants for tomorrow came down to three: Casa de Pico, Mi Guadalajara and On The Border)
2. C wet your pants (I could be wrong about this one, but I think things you did as a teenager cover both the other answers)
3. B Kennett, Missouri (how ya doin’, Berquita?)
4. C Pink (though purple and turquoise were your wedding colors and are the colors of your and Bret’s birthstones)
5. A Sean Connery (it’s the voice)
6. C Easter (too many chickies?)
7. A your camera (you’ll be the first in line when implantable cameras are available)
8. A Guac and chips (not ’cause you don’t like it, but ’cause it doesn’t like you)
9. C drive a stick shift
10. C a pueblo in Arizona (with really good air conditioning)
December 7th, 2007 at 10:36 am
Happy birthday, dear. It’s my wife’s birthday today too. You’re in great company.
December 7th, 2007 at 11:04 am
Happy Birthday to You!
December 7th, 2007 at 11:24 am
Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday cuz Hilly said sooooooooooooooooooooooo oh oh oh!
Happy Birthday to you!
December 7th, 2007 at 11:29 am
Happy Birthday!!
(Hilly sent me, and you know when Hilly says to do something you gotta do it right?)
Bri
December 7th, 2007 at 11:57 am
Hilly said to come here and wish you a happy birthday. I am 54, a grandfather, working on a real killer beer belly, and I’ll be God damned if I work until I drop, there, missy.
Oh wait, this was supposed to be about you.
Damn it.
December 7th, 2007 at 12:43 pm
I won’t pretend to know you well enough to answer the quiz. But did want to wish you a happy birthday.
December 7th, 2007 at 2:03 pm
I can’t say I know you well at all, by I bopped over from Hilly’s to wish you a very happy birthday!
December 7th, 2007 at 2:11 pm
Happy Happy Birthday!!! May all your birthday candle wishes come true…
I hope you embrace your 55edness. And please wave to me as I walk by, because you can now park in the close parking places at Walmart! :o)
December 7th, 2007 at 2:18 pm
Thanks, everyone, for the birthday wishes!!! You guys rock.
Sizzle: You didn’t totally blow it - you got three correct! Glad you had fun.
Hilly: Pretty good there, girlfriend. And hey, I’ve used Percocet as an excuse a time or two myself.
Avitable and Suebob: Thank you, and thanks for stopping by!
Sheryl: Not a perfect score, but close!
ajooja: See? All the hot babes were born on December 7th.
Cake Lady: Thanks, hon, but … where’s my cake???
Miss Britt and Briony: So what you saying is, I’m lucky Hilly didn’t tell everyone to come over here and tell me to fuck off and die, huh?
RW: Another slave to the OC Princess! Listen, if you can afford to retire and still fund your bad habits, I say go for it!
Nat: Thank you! Stick around, and you’ll ace next year’s quiz.
December 7th, 2007 at 2:20 pm
Well when in the fuuuuck do we get to know the answers?
December 7th, 2007 at 2:20 pm
Bre: Thank you for stopping by!
Kriss: What?!?! MY Wal-Mart doesn’t have senior parking!!! Unless you’re a pregnant senior.
December 7th, 2007 at 2:32 pm
Happy birthday, gorgeous
December 7th, 2007 at 2:47 pm
NO ANSWERS YET!!! My fairy blogdaughters, Suze and Kim, haven’t guessed yet. Neither has Juli, who’s busy hosting visiting execs today.
December 7th, 2007 at 2:48 pm
Thanks, Catherine!!!
December 7th, 2007 at 2:51 pm
I!!! LOVE!!!!!! EXCLAMATIONS!!!!!!!
Plus, I’ve eaten a birthday cupcake with 1″-thick frosting AND a Loaded Chocolate cookie today. Sugar high!!!!!!!!!!
December 7th, 2007 at 3:29 pm
HAPPY BORTHDAY!!! Sending cyber cupcakes too! Came by Snackie Poo!
December 7th, 2007 at 3:39 pm
Happy birthday!!!
I made you a low-fat carob cake with sugar-free icing and organic decorations, but then I came to my senses and got you a Mexican-chocolate torte.
Being old means you need more Vitamin C (chocolate). Frequent small doses are best. (Of course, I enacted this rule when I reached the ripe old age of 11…I may have jumped the gun a wee bit.)
December 7th, 2007 at 4:24 pm
Happy birthday!!! I hope you have a wonderful, love filled day!
Just started reading you recently, so I don’t really know you well enough to hazard a guess at most of the questions but I look forward to the answers : )
December 7th, 2007 at 4:29 pm
Happy Birthday SJ! I’m answering in a small voice, with my hand only half raised. I have excuses… Erm…
1. b. Mexican
2. b. Have sex
3. c. San Bernardino, California
4. c. Pink
5. a. Sean Connery
6. c. Easter
7. a. My camera
8. c. Onion rings with wasabi dip
9. a. Roller skate
10. b. A retro-influenced split-level on the cliffs of Cardiff, CA
December 7th, 2007 at 4:29 pm
Happy Birthday!!!
December 7th, 2007 at 4:31 pm
Mrs Mogul: OMG, at first I thought your comment said “HAPPY BORGDAY,” which would have been the coolest thing EVER! :borg: Thank goodness you are sending CYBER cupcakes, because I’ve already ODed on the sugar today.
Muse: Hey, I got the book - thank you!!! I like your rule, and it must work because you’re still alive! Mexican-chocolate torte, mmm … can you overnight it?
Hey, all you Snackie readers who are taking time to come over and extend birthday wishes to someone you don’t even know: YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME!!!
December 7th, 2007 at 4:37 pm
Melanie: Thanks to all my friends old and new, I am indeed have a love-filled day - thank you for adding to it! That’s one of the best dragonfly avatars I’ve seen.
Bec: Woo hoo!!! You got more right than wrong!
Lauren: Thank you, and thanks for stopping by!
December 7th, 2007 at 4:38 pm
You mean information is in my head?! Wow… that’s… scary!
December 7th, 2007 at 6:38 pm
Happy Birthday!!! They’ve blocked all blogs and other social-type sites at work (including Wikipedia!!! I rely on wikipedia…eep!) otherwise I’d have been here sooner.
Way to put us one the spot there!
my guesses;
1)b
2)b
3)a
4)c - especially your SuziPink(TM)
5)a - I have no idea, so I picked mine. It’s the voice…
6)c
7)that’s hard but i’m going with a. no wait, b. crap. I need you to have b so I can see what you take with a. Can I say both?
8)a(?)
9) ummm? b? I can’t do that either.
10)b - i can’t imagine you’ll ever leave California again…
Hope this was a wonderful birthday!
December 7th, 2007 at 6:51 pm
Happy Birthday! I always answer “C” to everything, so there you have it!
December 7th, 2007 at 8:28 pm
Oy! Happy Birthday!
December 7th, 2007 at 8:49 pm
Sorry you’re so bummed. But it is our shared week o’ birthdays so celebrate. Go get blitzed on 2 Degrees Below.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
December 7th, 2007 at 9:09 pm
Well, it looks like Kim is not available, so …
HERE ARE THE ANSWERS!
1. B. Mexican. I could eat Mexican food every day, and never get sick of it. I do sometimes mention how much I love the Thai restaurant next door to my office, which probably threw Sizzle off.
2. C. Wet my pants. I have swum naked many times, and have had sex in several public places, most notably during a Civics class and on a cliff overlooking La Jolla Cove, with a busy sidewalk just three feet above us. When ya gotta have it, ya gotta have it. To my knowledge, however, I have never peed in my panties more than a dribble.
3. B. Kennett, MO. But we moved from there when I was a baby. I spent my young childhood in Libya and my older childhood in California.
4. C. Pink. As Suze noted, especially my custom-blended SuziPink(TM). Although as Sheryl noted, purple & turquoise is my favorite color combination.
5. A. Sean Connery. He IS James Bond (and that voice, sigh). Roger Moore isn’t masculine enough. I do like Daniel Craig’s unpolished young Bond, but not as well as the original.
6. C. Easter. Creepy baby chickens and ducks everywhere you look! UGH. Not to mention the ghastliest excuse for “candy” ever invented, Peeps. UGH. This holiday cannot be redeemed even by deviled eggs, baked ham and Reese’s Peanut Butter Bunnies.
7. B. My computer. Yes, I dearly love taking pictures. Still, photography is a hobby. My computer is my lifeline. I spend about 80% of my waking hours at a computer. It’s my entertainment, my connection to friends, my reference tool, my favorite stores, my creative canvas. Without my computer, my life would be dismal in the extreme.
8. A. Guacamole and chips. Avocados = The Green Death. As Sheryl said, it’s not that I don’t like them. It’s that they hate me and want me to die an agonizingly painful death.
9. A, B and C. This was a trick question because, sadly, I cannot do any of the three. Many have attempted to teach me to skate or drive a stick shift, but I CANNOT master them. And I’m the only person in my family who can’t roll her tongue into a tube.
10. B. A retro-influenced split-level on the cliffs of Cardiff, CA. Or really, anywhere along the San Diego County coastline. I do love the desert and would love to own a vacation home near Tucson, but I will *NEVER AGAIN* make the mistake of living more than 30 minutes from the Pacific Coast. It nearly destroyed me, as readers of The Write Coast will recall. Oh, and the secluded mountain cabin? NO. People get murdered by maniacs in those things!
So there you have it!
Wait, is there an echo in here? Hello? Is this thing on?
December 7th, 2007 at 9:25 pm
Suze: Hey, you done good, Blogdaughter!
Dave2: And you got four correct!
Iron Fist: A dank aych!
Kevin: I’m not bummed - in my family , reaching the age of 55 is a Very Good Sign. So the 2 Degrees Below was tasty?
December 7th, 2007 at 11:49 pm
Saw your blog on Holidailies.
Happy birthday.
December 8th, 2007 at 7:35 am
Happy Birthday, SJ! Sent by Hilly…though I arrived a little late to the party.
December 8th, 2007 at 7:46 am
Kitty and Kim: Thanks — it’s never too late for birthday wishes!
December 8th, 2007 at 8:20 am
Sorry I missed the fun.
Happpiest of Happy Birthday’s to you, SJ!!!!!!
December 8th, 2007 at 8:56 am
I’m sorry I didn’t get to your blog yesterday, Moma! I hope you had a fun, fun birthday.
Just so we’re good… I would have gotten all of those right except #2. Looks like I know you pretty darn well. xoxo
December 8th, 2007 at 9:34 am
I am late, but Happy Birthday
December 8th, 2007 at 9:38 am
Sorry I was too late to guess. I would have guessed the guacamole one wrong and the trick question! But now I know you really are my fairy blogmother, because you love mexican food as much as me. I mean, I must have gotten it from you
December 8th, 2007 at 10:12 am
Happy belated birthday, SJ. Sorry I took so long to get over here to pass my best wishes along. I hope it was fantastic!
December 8th, 2007 at 6:18 pm
Lisa: I’m still celebrating, so you’re good!
Juli: The cliff incident? That was with your dad. On our second date. And now you’re old enough to know.
Kim: You don’t remember awhile back when I was so sick from accidentally eating avocado?!?! When you come to California for DaveDiego next summer, I’m going to introduce you to REAL Mexican food!!!
Aunt Robin: Thank you so much for stopping by! It was indeed wonderful, and continued on through today …
December 8th, 2007 at 11:01 pm
I’m here via Hilly & am a few days late, but I think that must mean you’re not just going to have a happy birthday, but an ENTIRE happy year!!
55 isn’t what it was when we were young…no way. I remember my aunts were old at 40! Things are so different now.
55 is the new 30.
December 10th, 2007 at 9:35 am
Happy Belated Birthday! Hope it was a good one!
I like to say I’m growing older but not up
December 10th, 2007 at 1:26 pm
Jane: Oh, I totally agree that 55 is the new 30. Or at least 50 is. And I expect to have an awesome second half!
MB: I wouldn’t mind doing some growing UP, in the physical sense! Even just 3 or 4 more inches would help.
Again, thank you ALL for celebrating my birthday with me!!!
December 11th, 2007 at 12:36 pm
Happy belated birthday, SJ! Sorry, haven’t been around at all lately. Hope you had a great fun day.
December 11th, 2007 at 6:30 pm
I can’t answer any of the questions because this is my first time hear (via Hilly).
But you’re NOT old. (I can say that because I’m 56, so if you’re old, I may be dead).
But I am really pissed off that the Sr. Citizens Discount at 55 has pretty much been eliminated.
I do have you beat though. I DO have grandchildren (two ages 8 & 10). I have a few wrinkles (mostly on my hands, yuck), and I’ve lost all my upper teeth (yuck again) but have a plate.
I’m totally going to read your blog only because I don’t see a lot of women my age blogging. Hell, I have a son older than Hilly!
SO, Happy Birthday. Be good to yourself. Next month is mine. I’ll be inconsolable! You sound pretty good about yours though!
December 12th, 2007 at 6:10 am
I’m so sorry I missed your birthday! I hope it was a good one. I’m happy to see that you got lotsaluv in the comments, even if I am a deadbeat blog “buddy”!!!! (I like exclamation points too!!! along with parentheses and ellipses…)
December 28th, 2007 at 6:37 am
Hi SuziJane
Well, you reached the big DOUBLE NICKELS a couple of months before I did. Congratulations, and you are looking good!
Sorry I haven’t been keeping up with anyone’s blog for ages and ages, but hope to get caught up a little now that I have a somewhat newer computer.
Love ya,
Marjie of MB’s Blogasm